sick day

 Called in sick today - my body is feeling inflamed (including being puffy, joints hurt) which often means I'm battling a virus.  When I can take a day off to rest, it can help me from getting super sick.  Often in my job I have to push through, but I didn't have much on my schedule today, so fuck it.  Sick. 

I'll probably spend the day sitting on the couch with my dog, planning future roadtrips she won't get to go on (because she's a psychopath and mortal).  I requested a week off in September already, and I plan to keep watching the weather for when it warms up a bit more and take off a few days to go camping a couple of hours away - at a gorgeous rock place I really like (but it was too hot to enjoy when I was last there, so I really want to go in spring before too hot), and maybe to a volcanic place I think is cool, or maybe hot springs.  

Oh dang, just pulled up on spending from last year and see that it was too hot in early June ... um, I better get some vacation time planned soon, especially because I'm very busy with work in late April.  Weird though, the campground at the lava place doesn't even open until mid-June.  I wonder if that's a weather thing or a school thing (enough people want to go after school is out).  OK, I think I should just book dates for early May, and just go.  If I take off Wed-Friday, I could enjoy mid-week hopefully less busy at the destinations, and be back for at least a full weekend day to shop and cook for the week.  And if there are fires or freak snowstorm or whatever, i can just cancel, no harm, no foul.  I'll check with Friend that she can keep the dog.  

So yeah, two little road trips expected for this year.  and then when the dog is gone and I've quit my job, I'll plan to do a massive continental road trip.  I'll probably drive because there are a number of places I want to go off the beaten path.  Maybe in places like New York i can leave my car with friends upstate and train all around - into the city, to Montreal, etc.  I loved the brief time I spent in Quebec and definitely want to spend some solid time there, so maybe I would drive there (did it before with a rental car when we were at a work function in Vermont).  I'd like to spend time in Vermont too - see if maybe that's where I'd like to land.  I want to visit with friends all over the United States, and I wish I could just take the train everywhere but it's complicated since our train system is so underdeveloped especially in much of the .  Maybe for a future roadtrip.  

Oof, it's already 10 am and I'm still barely getting moving for the day.  I did move the frozen burritos into a bag and the deep freeze; processed half of them, will do the other half around lunchtime.  Just had some lentils on a whole wheat pita with cheese for breakfast.  Dinner is expected to be tofu broccoli with black barley.  I'm embarrassed to say this, especially as I live in a place with local tofu production, but I really really like the Costco tofu.  Once I need to go get gas, I'll pick some more up.  Last got gas almost four weeks ago and I still have half a tank.  

Something that popped up into my feed is "Vegan abattoir" which is actor Kevin Smith having turned vegan because of a massive heart attack and his daughter.  Veganism is definitely always in the back of my mind.  I don't have to be 100% full in, but I can keep reducing my animal product consumption.  

Also when I put the burritos in the freezer, I realized the freezer is still too damn full and I need to eat it down, strategically.  Like, I am happy to have a couple dozen burritos and loaves of sourdough in my freezer to get me through busy times, but those berries and vegetables should get consumed.  To be fair, the space isn't most efficiently utilized because I put a lot of things into jars instead of plastic bags, especially things like dehydrated fruit, which I eat pretty slowly.  Though I might start increasing the consumption of that, either through snacking, or adding grain flakes for musli, or maybe rehydrate and process to use as sweetener, put into energy balls instead of dates, etc.?  I'm sure there are lots of possibilities.  I didn't get green plums last year because of an aphid infestation but hopefully they'll go away (I've seen more ladybugs).  The years before were always overly abundant, so if I could use those plums in various other ways because they're sweet, that would be great.  It's not like I spent a ton of money on dates when I consider it my primary sweetener source (I use date paste for sweetener in muffins, use dates in energy balls, etc.) - only $13 this year, $57 all of last year - but wouldn't it be cool if I could replace them with what's free in my yard?  

OK, yay, completed a task.  I had an upholstered chair given to me months ago, and its been in my garage.  Just cleaned it and then finished off the cleaner tank cleaning the rugs that get the most wear.  Yay, that feel nice.  Not crazy about the smell of the cleaning solution, but the rugs definitely look cleaner. I'm not crazy about figuring out how to clean the damn machine either, but it's worth using a couple times a year.  It wasn't a big task and didn't overwhelm me because it's the only thing I'm doing today, and I'm glad it's done.  I like the chair, though I probably should repaint the wood parts.  

Clearly I'm ready for spring cleaning ... I am going to wait to change the couch covers until after it's warm though, so they can dry outside.  Same with all my bedding (again, yes i washed it all not long ago).  I should probably plan some other deep cleaning.  I try to keep things clean but I don't always do allll the things, like wash down walls or empty out drawers or whatever.  Though, I have been thinking about putting more shelf liner paper in drawers and on shelves so maybe I will.  I go through my food supplies pretty often, no 27 year old condensed soup tucked somewhere. (Plus of course I've only lived here less than three years, and my kitchen is only two years old.  Oh god I'm so glad the renovations are done.)  I could do some looking up for any cobwebs, etc., but generally I just tackle things as I seem them - or put them on a list that I handle sooner or later.  most of my cleaning tasks will be better done in spring or summer, such as all the window cleaning, especially since I want to try to remove old paint from the sides of the windows.  The previous owners hired a fucking asshole of a "painter" who really fucked shit up.  I think I can use a plastic putty knife to scrape off most of the paint, and then I can caulk them well.  It's just a better project when warm, I believe.  

Hopefully I feel better tomorrow as there are some outdoors tasks I'd like to take on, such as flipping compost and doing the last mulch moving (for now ... I'm sure to get more mulch again soon ...)

Speaking of cleaning out the cupboards, I finally made the tofu PB chocolate pie I've been wanting for ages.  I'd gradually acquired the ingredients and just whipped it up so it's chilling, and then I'll freeze it in slices.  Yum.  A friend made it for me over 20 years ago and it quickly became a favorite and I shared with others, but it's been a really really long time since I've made it.  Oh, that's right - I quit eating soy in 2008 when I had a massive fibroid they thought was cancerous (spoiler: it wasn't, but the surgery recovery was intense and I had to give up studying abroad for a semester which still bums me out).  Now that I'm firmly into menopause, bring me All The Soy.  I don't know if giving it up soy stopped subsequent fibroids or not, but it sure did make me skeptical of medical opinions.   

I did read some of the book I need to return as it's due today (The Dream Hotel) but it's so depressing and so easy to imagine being non-fiction that I do struggle with it.  Hopefully I can power through and move onto the next one soon.  And if I can't, I will just return it unfinished and look up the ending somewhere.  I have five books currently checked out and six on the waitlist from when I looked up a lot in December with the "best of the year" lists.  Definitely got some good ones.  

Been thinking a lot about what's next, and I want it all.  I want to hang onto my house while also traveling for extended periods of time. And the hope is that I'll find someplace wonderful where I want to move to, but I don't think I'm ready to give up this house until I know that for sure.  So, that means at least three more years of working at my job, to pay off the house and have sufficient savings to frolic. 

But also, hanging onto my house if I'm traveling a lot is a hassle and negates the benefits of having it (gardening, etc.).  It's a tension I've always experienced, because I have lived in many homes that I loved for many different reasons.  I still think fondly of all of them and appreciate all that they provided to me, and then I have let them go when the time was right, for a variety of reasons.  So, I certainly do not have to make decisions today about years from now, even though it would be nice to know for reasons of garden planning and such (do I buy a plum tree today??).  The future is always unknown to me because I don't stay fixed on any one path.  And the country is such a shitshow right now, starting wars and other horrific things that could definitely change what is possible, if we're even all still alive.  

Sigh.  Just take it one day at a time.