The hound and I went over to visit friends yesterday (work released us early). Their dog was so happy to see us and he bounded around with joy, with the funniest little gallop, and Ziggy was good at first. They were completely appropriate running around and doing things near each other, and it was a perfect day for us to sit outside in their little yard, with the only part missing was that Mr. friend had to go to do PT and Ziggy really loves him. That lasted about an hour, and then she first looked out the gate where he'd gone to see if he'd be coming back, and then came to me and looked to convey "I'm ready to go." I thought I'd have time to finish a leisurely conversation, but with her typical urgency she then started to melt down almost immediately. When she's done, she's done, and off we went. We were really only there to say hi and get her a break from the constant pounding on the house from carpenters, but we stopped along the way for a goat head she'll enjoy devouring today as her Thanksgiving treat (and ham hocks for me, that I'll cook a big pot of greens with - my backyard collards are looking very good), and then I stopped at a nursery and got a native mulberry tree to plant where the citrus are getting removed from. The horticulturist was good and smart and I appreciated him, but it is not a native plant nursery and they had very little. He did suggest crabapple tree but then it turns out the ones they have aren't local to here, and I wasn't sure how usable they were anyway. When I was a kid spending summers in the midwest I remember being out on horseback and running into (literally - the horse was an asshole) a bunch of crabapples that I picked and took and my aunt said they were not useful and I was sad. But I could probably figure out uses, like jelly, but I wanted to investigate first. He also suggested yaupon holly which is lovely for birds but I need to look at it some more before deciding. And honestly my front yard is getting pretty packed now, and I don't really want more bird luring into my backyard because they're starting to make my dog crazy. The mulberries will be enough, though she will quite like all that the birds drop and she can eat.
And now it's Thanksgiving, my favorite holiday, though of course fraught with unfaced historical atrocities. I like it as a harvest festival, as a transitioning of seasons, of gathering with friends.
Oh glad I looked up the yaupon holly - it's definitely not for me. And to clarify, my yard isn't actually packed at all - it's quite sparse. But the plants will fill in quite nicely I expect, and I can add as space allows, but I don't want to crowd out what I've planted now. I have one more nursery to check out before I'm done for the season. I am notoriously NOT a landscaper, but I'm ok with that.
Sweet potatoes are in the oven, as I'll make a pie. Potatoes just about ready to boil up for midwestern potato dairy casserole. Laundry going, to hang on the line. I want to do a thorough housecleaning, but it's very nice out today so I may do more yardwork instead until I head over to dinner at 2. It's cutting up my day but that's fine - we'll be dining outside. When going inside, my friend asks that we mask, and I know she has serious health issues with a transplant and such. What I just learned is that 77% of the adult population of New Orleans is fully vaccinated, which is great. I'm set to get a booster but a bit afraid of negative side effects and don't want to give up a weekend feeling crappy.
Oh, what I was going to say - my friends we visited are thinking of moving away, and that has me even more serious about leaving myself. They are probably my closest friends here (definitely Ziggy's closest friends) and we would really miss them. So then I started looking up retirement communities where friends live and found a perfect one - in a mid-sized town, located right downtown near lots of things nearby, with independent living but also lots of activities, and dinner and brunch provided. The price is great for all that and I could make that work sooner than later. I am only in my mid-50s and have loads of time before I really NEED to move into a community like that, but I recall that my grandmother's very best years were spent in a place like that. I remember the big house that she lived in, in a small town, and the decision to move to another part of the state to be in the same place as her daughter. She refused to live with any of her children because she had cared for many years for her father in her home, and he was awful, and she didn't want to be that way. She did get cranky as she aged, so she called that right. But her best years (at least after her husband died, when I was a baby and don't remember) were those spent in a retirement community where she had her own apartment and friends all around. It was fun to visit her there and I think something like that would be great for me someday.
But of course not yet and probably not for many years. But I can think about the pleasures of it - dinner provided and not having to cook myself? Sweet. Weekly housecleaning? A close community of people who have time to hang out? That all sounds good to me. I just feel overwhelmed now, with all my projects, and I understand the appeal of downsizing. And I'm loving the idea of having less stuff. I could minimize now, but the reality is that I use the things I have, so that would be stupid. As I was saying to my friend, I have all these ladders which the carpenters are using, because it's necessary for all that needs to be done ... but how great it would be to live someplace where I don't have to have ladders because other people are wholly responsible.
But not today. Today I am cooking and cleaning and gardening and all that on my own. So it goes.
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