trying Calm app

 I did a free week trial of the Calm app, giving myself a few days to find out if it's worth the $70 for a year.  

Yesterday I did a short meditation on stopping my mind spinning, and that actually helped.  Then I couldn't go to sleep again, and I really could not bear three sleepless nights (this is all so unusual for me), and so I got my phone and put on a sleep thing on the app.  I think it was a story, and I thought, "this is ridiculous, I'm paying too much attention and it won't make me sleep," but then I fell asleep pretty fast.  I woke up less than an hour later, probably around the time it finished, and then I played a "go back to sleep" and that worked, though I then woke up a few hours later.  

Still not back to eight hours of sleep ... or seven ... or probably even six.  But it was better!  Just tried the spinning mind thing and it didn't work at all today, tried another meditation and it was gross, did not like AT ALL.  

But there's a lot of content and maybe I just have to curate what I like.  

So, probably worth it. 

I'm still exhausted and my head it pounding, but I got past a huge work stress and now I can breathe for a few weeks, sort of.  I need to rehydrate.  I had lentil shepherds pie that I baked tonight after pretty yesterday, and it was totally worth it.  Took two servings over to the community fridge and still have leftovers for a couple of days.  I ate my rice and beans yesterday and today, so I'm almost out of ideas ... oh wait, salmon and sweet potato medallions and green beans. That will be an excellent dinner tomorrow, just need to pull the fish out of the freezer.